Chit-Chat on Bofors and Rafale

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Ten years. That is how long Chitra Subramaniam worked on the Bofors scandal, from Geneva in Switzerland. She was 29 and pregnant when she began her investigation. She continued to follow the paper trail and money trail to their end, even after the Hindu fired her. Her husband sponsored her entire investigation and she did some ground-breaking work in bringing out all the dirt and setting some heightened standards for investigative journalism. The Bofors scandal led to the change of certain Swiss laws.

It wasn’t that there were no scandals before that, but Bofors came at a time when the country was looking up to Rajiv Gandhi with great hope after having lived through a cynical age during his mother’s government. Rajiv was portrayed as a clean person. So, when she held the papers that connected him to the scandal, Chitra said she was shaking. After her extended period of work, a box load of documents arrived in India for investigation. Although no one knows what happened of those documents, the Rafale deal has stirred up the public attention again. Everyone had almost forgotten about Bofors until somebody compared the Rafale deal to that of the Bofors.

According to Chitra, there is corruption in every deal including the Rafale. Yet she considers the Bofors and Rafale deal as chalk and cheese. In Bofors, for the first time, the prime minister of India was personally involved and stood accused of corruption. The Rafale, on the other hand, is not clear if politicians were involved. There sure are a lot of unanswered questions including the involvement of the Reliance group, but this story must be built piece by piece and not jumped to conclusions without following the conventional rules of journalism. She also insisted that the audience should read the works of Abhijit Iyer Mitra who probably knows the most about the Rafale scandal.

Chitra said the VP Singh government rode on the Bofors scandal but did nothing about it. And nothing is stopping the current government in doing anything about. However, the politicians are like ‘all scorpions stuck in a bottle’. They have together turned a lot of our institutions corrupt. They can’t moralize each other.

Chitra laughed when asked if the European countries are as clean as they are portrayed by the corruption index. She took the examples of Sweden, France and Italy to establish how the European countries are rather more corrupt.

Chidanand Rajghatta, the current Foreign Editor and U.S Bureau Chief of The Times of India, who was moderating the discussion with Chitra brought up an important point about how Indians are not ready to pay for news and expect it to be available for free. He thought that this hunt for free or cheaper news is causing financial constraints on the media houses which probably is the reason why they don’t dive deep to bring out the truth. But, Chitra said that the media houses have enough money when they want to have them and that cannot be the reason. She said people here indulge in a lot of gossips. Everyone thinks they know everything and everyone has an opinion about everything. People no longer follow the two-source theory of journalism. They write something because it all online now and can be edited later if needed. She also said that these media houses are constantly under pressure especially if the establishment is family-run. But they should be careful because social media has become the new watchdog. An eternal optimist that she is, Chitra reiterated that the media must continue to question and do their job.

Hampi: Of Gods And Kings

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The history that we come from is rich, and often has a sense of mystique around it. This is especially so when places like Hampi fall into the list. The city in ruins, and UNESCO World Heritage site, Hampi is home to hundreds of monuments in ruins. From beautiful pillars to the pristine river and the majestic hills around, Hampi has a sense of magic that surrounds it.

In his coffee table book, Bharath Ramamrutham brings together tens of pictures of Hampi. The audience had a glimpse of the pictures that went into the making of the book, and each of it is one that certainly tickles the wanderlust in each of them. The raw, almost unbelievable views from atop the hills, the architecture, the abandoned and perfect irrigation systems, the sky’s generous touch to the spectacular city below, all of it has been skillfully captured by Bharath Ramamrutham. While the pictures rolled by, and the audience marvelled at the colours and yearned to be transported, Bharath’s reading from the book equally captivated them all. It was the perfect background to the awe of viewing the pictures.

Bharath, in conversation with Shama Pawar, one who has been dedicated to the conservation and development of Hampi while residing in the little historical site for 20 plus years now, toured through the initiatives in Hampi that keep the hub alive. Shama’s Kishkinda Trust helps the local community in Hampi in its socio-economic sphere. The community and its involvement in guarding the space have become a reality through various programs run by the trust.

This thriving historical site was captured by Bharath, and the book aptly named Hampi: Of Gods and Kings to bring in the vibe of magic and royalty into it. No visitor comes back without a longing to go back again, and Bharath views the site as a sacred one. The book has no pictures of people, an unconscious decision, he says. The place was to be captured for its natural beauty, its landscapes, and warranted no distractions!

While many books are today available on Hampi, with academicians and photographers in tow, these books become far more educational than artistic in nature, he says. The book celebrates the place itself, and as is. For those of us longing, and wanting to travel to Hampi, this book might just be that extra reason we seek.

 

About the Author: A believer in the subtlety of magic in everyday living, and Shobhana seeks the same from the books she reads, and the poetry she writes. Immerses herself in music, literature, art, and looking out the window with some coffee. She curates her poetry, and occasional verses in her blog Thinking; inking. She currently writes for Bookstalkist.

The Reading Life

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In a video that I watched yesterday, a bear cub made several attempts to climb up to his mother waiting on the top of a mountain that was hiding under the snow. The cub climbed a few scratches higher every time he tried but skidded down the slope on each of those spirited attempts. His failure didn’t bother him. He grew up again, gathered a lungful, and scaled a greater altitude than the previous time. He tried straight up, he slithered, and he traced his mother’s paw-marks, all to end up at mark zero. It was a devastating sight. A fall further from his start and death would have engulfed him with love much before his due time. He was beginning to look like a play-ball trying to get back to the shore riding on current knowing well that it had no utility in the ocean and in any case, the child at the shore expected the ball to rebound when he threw it away into the waters! So, the ball keeps riding the waves one after the other till it reaches close enough to be pulled up but the child falters, the ball gets withdrawn again before finally getting thrown outside on the sand with a splash on the child’s face. The cub likewise, kept on rising and falling till he finally conquered the peak and joined his mother. As I write this, my mind also wanders to Christopher Nolan’s treatment of the Batman in his third installment in the series. Bane puts Bruce Wayne in ‘the pit’ and we are treated to, artistically speaking, one of the most breathtaking sequences we will die having seen when Bruce attempts to escape the pit and after many failed leaps, conquers his fear of failure.

I watched this cub video more than once and kept thinking about what I saw. I gave my mind some time, an optimal pace to play and replay the cub’s conquest in slow motion in my head, and kept thinking about the myriad other ways it could have unfolded in. What if the mother bear had come down to rescue the cub? What if the cub had given up and stayed at one point without making any further attempts? What if the cub had continued falling never to reach the summit? What if the cub had renounced his yearning to reach the top?

The last bit lingered over me for some more time. I wondered about the possibility of the cub developing a taste, a fondness for the struggle itself. If the cub kept floating high and below over the snow, if Bruce found a liking for the hymns and cheers of other members of the pit, would we stop longing for the end of the conquest? What if the end of our struggles also means the end of our purpose? I read Annie Dillard’s ‘The Writing Life’ yesterday. She constructed a snow laden mountain for me to climb. She threw me into the pit of death so that I could come out alive. I kept at my futile attempts to reach the top. I studied the contusions on my knees, the concussions to my head in that one moment when you reach the zero velocity just before falling back from no matter how high. I held the doorknobs of time in that instant and stretched the doors to as far I could between my arms and looked carefully into myself – the reader; and just before I could let myself fly down to the boundless abyss, Annie held me by my neck and pulled me up. The reader they say, must behave himself.

Source for the image.

Lives of Girls and Women

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The session ‘Lives of Girls & Women’ witnessed an interesting conversation between the author of the book ‘Rulebreakers’ – Preeti Shenoy and the author of the book ‘Nine chambered heart’ – Janice Pariat and was moderated by Kiran Manral. These two books and their plots, characters and narratives were discussed in a simple yet explicit detail. Kiran remarked that these two books were extremely lovely but brought out entirely different styles of writing.

Kiran opened the discussion by asking both the authors if they as female writers felt the need to focus on the feminine experience and write through the feminine gaze in their writing. Preeti responded by saying that people have never looked at books differently based on the gender of narration or considered her books as feminine literature. She went on to say that out of the 11 books she has written, some are also written from the male point of view. She said that people have never not taken her books seriously because of them being told from the feminine point of view and that all her female protagonists were strong.

Janice said that it’s really important for her to realize that many types of feminine experiences exist in the first place, to have and be had. She says that every writer has their own trajectory travelled through which they write what they write. She says that each of us has different ghosts inside us and these ghosts constantly tussle and that she writes about the ghosts which are at the surface.

Kiran then asked Preeti what she essentially wanted to say through her protagonist Veda who gets married early in her life and her journey. Preeti started off by stating statistics regarding the legal and average age for marriage in India and mentioned that the current average age for women to get married in India is 25. She then spoke of statistics from a poll she held in her Instagram account where she asked her followers if they would marry a person their parents suggested who ticked all their boxes and a high percentage of them responded positively. In the next poll, she asked them how many women who were married at an early age were now unhappy and 65% of them said that they were unhappy. She said that all she wanted Indian women to have was that one thing just for themselves apart from their husband and the kids, which would stay with them forever. It could be gardening, writing or anything else. She spoke of how there is power in financial independence.

Kiran then asked Janice the reason behind the kind of narrative in her book where the protagonist is only described through the gaze of the men who were in love with her. Janice started off by comparing her book to a galaxy where there’s sun which is the protagonist who is viewed in the eyes of all the planets which form are the other characters. She says that she chose this structure of narrative because it is the closest to life and went on to explain how we always can only view people through tiny slivers and moments but never know someone in their entirety. Many had even asked her if the protagonist of her book was a silent victim to all the male gaze and while she agreed that it could be one interpretation, she thought that silence is the most powerful narrative. As she said that, she revealed how she considered her narrative more of a whirlpool than a galaxy. She said that the book’s narrative talks about being able to exist between multiple perspectives.

Janice then spoke about how women have always had to create a room of one’s own in their mind to get away from the world. When Preeti was asked about what she would do if she were in Veda’s place and asked to marry early, she spoke of how women mostly never speak their mind and said that if she were in Veda’s place she would speak her mind and talk to her parents directly. The stage was opened to an enthusiastic audience for further questions.

 

About the Author: Bhargavi Komanduri is a final year student at BITS Pilani, Hyderabad. She has profound admiration for writing, reading, theatre, dance, movies, chocolates and chai. Being a seeker of good art in all shapes, and forms; Bhargavi also strives to be on the creators’ side of creation. Her journey has just begun as she unleashes her poems and thoughts every week. Find her foray into this new found creative spirit, on Medium, here – https://medium.com/@bhargavi2497. She currently writes for Bookstalkist.

Imran Khan: In the Hot Seat

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The recent political change in Pakistan has been a hot topic of discussion at the Bangalore Literature Festival. Farzana Shaik was in conversation with Max Rodenbeck and the discussion was more about the current economic crisis of Pakistan, Imran,’s promise for a new Pakistan, and his leadership as such.

According to Farzana, although the current outlook is great for Pakistan, Imran’s stance in various socio-political issues is not encouraging. It’s rather disturbing. Earlier, his party had strongly opposed the provincial laws for women empowerment. Imran himself had said that supporting those legislations which protect women from domestic violence and abuse would mean breaking the family set up in Pakistan. Imran has also been extremely silent on what his government intends to do with the terrorism sponsored from Pakistani borders, the Jihadi movements or even the greylisting of Pakistan for economic assistance, thanks to its inaction.

Given that Imran is strongly backed by the army, one cannot expect too much of a change in Pakistan’s foreign policy. Also since the military had a tough time when their blue-eyed boy Nawaz Sheriff turned rogue, they are going to have a closer watch over Imran. Going by the past record, there is a chronic circularity about the individuals who became the Prime Ministers of Pakistan. So there might be no room for bigger changes especially since the constitutional clauses that were used against Nawaz are still very much in place.

Imran promised 5million in homes and 10 million in jobs during his campaign. But it is going to be extremely difficult thanks to the debts. One cannot deny that there is popular support for Imran in Pakistan. His political discourse does chime with a lot of people in Pakistan. However, the by-polls indicate how the Pakistanis are already disenchanted with his party even in areas which were considered his strongholds.

Its been three months since he came to power but he still conducts himself like an opposition leader. His politics is not distinguishable from container politics and he still continues the vindictive politics. He hasn’t evolved into a statesman, as one would expect of him.

Speaking of Imran’s approach towards India, Farzana says supporters of Imran might point out that he was open towards India. Imran even said that if India took one step forward, Pakistan would take two. However, historically, any government that had an independent policy towards India always paid the price for it. Farzana also insisted that the Indian government should not stick to the ‘no talk until terrorism ends’ policy but continue the diplomatic talks with Pakistan.

ISRO: A Personal History

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The Indian Space Research Organisation, or ISRO, is one the most widely respected and revered organizations in the country. It has no doubt placed India on the map of Space research, with the many successful PSLVs, and the hugely popular Chandrayaan and Mangalyaan.
Of course, as any success story goes, there are humble beginnings that lead up to all the fanfare.

ISRO’s rise has been traced in the book by Gita and R Aravamudan. Mr Aravamudan was a handpicked engineer by Dr Vikram Sarabhai to work with India’s Space Program. His wife, Gita Aravamudan is an established journalist who has co-authored the book with her husband. He chuckles, the book was written by the two of them, where Gita did most of the writing and the content came in from him.

The session saw them trace the journey of ISRO from its humble beginning with just about 6 of them, taking up training from NASA, and setting up in the ionosphere of Trivandrum with the initial motivation to have sounding rockets launched with a few payloads. To fuel this, set up a station in Thumba. A few years into it, the technological revolution around the world had opened up the door for new technology in the communication front, and that was where Dr Sarabhai drew the idea of satellite vehicle building from.

The humble beginnings of ISRO which began with rockets like that of “Diwali crackers” has now taken intellectual minds over the years to build a mammoth of an organization today. He calls this a fantastic example of a Government run technical organization. This is the essence of the book, he says. With modest budgets, and with the laws of the Government, the employees were still motivated to do something for the organization. Gita recounts the experiments that included balloons that were sent up in the air in the initial days.

ISRO is an example of a single visionary’s guide to the establishment of it, with the full support from the Government while it was still establishing itself, Aravamudan says. It also had a clear agenda and transparency with which it operates. Its failures and successes were out in the open for all to see; the failures which were much mocked at.

His work alongside the late president Dr A.P.J Abdul Kalam, he calls from his memory fondly, and their successes with the Satellite Launch Vehicles, the hardships in procuring technology, and overcoming all of it is also etched in his memory. He remembers how they egged each other on, and that Satish Dhawan’s encouraging words brought in the much-needed inspiration. Till today, of the 40, 39 of the SLVs have been successful, a record in the making! Today, the Mangalyaan and Chandrayaan have been hugely successful even in its first attempt, he adds in excitedly.

Gita asks his opinion on the many comments and questions that come in from the public on the importance of investing in space programs when India is still grappling with very many economic issues. He draws a parallel, if a movie could cost 4 times more than the entire Mangalyaan project, it definitely answers the question. Moreover, being technologically dependent on other countries for critical technology such as GPS is a risk to the defence of the country. An investment in these programs will not only make India self-sufficient and cost-efficient but plays a huge role in governing our safety as well.

The book is one that definitely acknowledges the never say die spirit of the ISRO, a stunning example of a Government run organization that works like a well-oiled machine, only making the country proud with each passing year.

 

 

About the Author: A believer in the subtlety of magic in everyday living, and Shobhana seeks the same from the books she reads, and the poetry she writes. Immerses herself in music, literature, art, and looking out the window with some coffee. She curates her poetry, and occasional verses in her blog Thinking; inking. She currently writes for Bookstalkist.

Whose Lie is it Anyway: #Fakenews

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The fact that even the Panchatantra and the Aesop’s Fables have a story about the shepherd boy who cried wolf when there was no wolf, underlines the fact that the phenomenon of fake news is not something ultra modern or a product of the internet age. However, to discuss the cry-wolves of our times, Nitin Pai, founder of Takshashila brought together personalities of contrasting backgrounds and competing tones for the last panel discussion at the Bangalore Literature Festival 2018. In attendance were award winning journalist best known for her Bofors investigation and editor-in-chief of thenewsminute.com – Chitra Subramaniam, Paris born journalist and author who has been South Asia correspondent for Le Figaro, one of France’s leading newspapers – François Gautier, Editor of The Hindu – Mukund Padmanabhan, Editor of scroll.in – Naresh Fernandes, Founder and Editor of AltNews – Pratik Sinha, and Sreenivasan Jain, Managing Editor of New Delhi Television (NDTV).

In order to set the context, Nitin asked each panelist about what defined fake news. Naresh opined with an example that while misinformation could be an error of judgement, disinformation with malice would count as fake news. Pratik of the AltNews gave the example of the Amritsar train tragedy wherein a fake narrative had been peddled about the driver’s religion to create social unrest and stressed upon the fact that fake news was affecting people of all ages, including children. Chitra joined the discussion and asserted that the phrase ‘fake news’ was an oxymoron and according to her there was only good journalism and then there was bad journalism. She also added that fake news happens when people with motives manufacture events and news.

Sreenivasan Jain kept the central government and the party in power at the centre at the centre of his attack and went on to say, “I believe that the only way to solve a problem is to first identify the problem. Fake news is not just lying in the dark corners of the internet but the central power itself plays a game of fake news by churning out propagandist theories and cherry picked data. These institutions, be it the government or the party in power have mainstreamed what was on the fringe.” He claimed that love jihad, scare mongering in the name of cows were part of this fake news propaganda. François, on the other hand, maintained that the word ‘fake news’ was too strong a word. Journalists have strong opinions and they pick stories and derive from them according to their opinions. He cited the example of the Nun rape case at Jhabua where mainstream media rushed to point fingers at the Hindu right wing groups but soon it was found that there were tribals and christians involved. François also cautioned people against the impulse of demonising the politicians because they were the the elected representatives in the country.

Nitin Pai further wanted the panel to explore the doors where fake news could be checked and threw the question to Naresh. Naresh mentioned that the government was trying to bring in some technological solutions to this menace but that wasn’t going to help. The session grew hotter by second and Sreenivasan provided a counter to François by saying that to criticize politician is not demonising him and to criticize the BJP doesn’t mean one is anti-Hindu. For him, the fake news machinery run by the government itself is the most dangerous one when compared to the fake news being peddled on whatsapp. Chitra had a contrarian point of view and asserted that she had lived through congress regimes and remembered how she and her family were harrassed with spread of falsehoods for ten years. She also claimed that while the word ‘fringe’ gets quoted a lot, the lot on the stage was the actual fringe which didn’t really understand India and how India thought. According to her, journalists must earn the right to be read like the politicians earn the right to lead.

François added his own perception of the Indian media and said that the Indian people did not have much respect for the the Indian media. Also, according to him, most of the media establishments have been left leaning in India. He underlined the importance of his views because he was born a catholic and unlike other people who parrot what they had heard from their older generations, he had learnt India first hand. Nitin went deeper into the subject and asked the panel if there were prejudices of people playing out as well. Pratik explained the importance of giving due attention to the fake news happening on whatsapp. “For rural areas, the influential people do affect opinions of the common people because they own smartphones and have access to internet and news”, added Pratik.

The session concluded with an attempt to fix the accountability question. Mukund agreed that Whatsapp was one of the major vectors for fake news and as such should not be ignored or downplayed. Also, not only does fake news affect the ignorant or gullible but also the intelligent and the informed lot. He maintained that the damage done by fake news was much worse than the redressal options like retraction etc.. Journalists and media houses must learn to apologize more often because there is no shame attached with it if one makes a mistake”, opined Mukund.

The session came to a close with a wide array of questions from the audience members and seemed to reinforce the idea of diversity in discourse which the Bangalore Literature Festival stands for.

How I Became a Hindu: My Discovery of Vedic Dharma

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David Frawley spoke on ‘How I Became a Hindu: My Discovery of Vedic Dharma’ at the creatively named venue ‘Adjust Maadi’. Dr. David Frawley (Pandit Vamadeva Shastri) is a Vedic teacher and Hindu Acharya. He is the author of fifty books published in twenty languages worldwide. His fields of expertise include Yoga, Ayurveda, Vedanta, Jyotish and ancient Vedic texts. He has also written extensively on historical, social and cultural issues facing Hinduism and India today. Not to shy away from discussing contentious issues, Dr. Frawley began with describing his work of promoting vedic education, all paths of yoga, vedanta, jyotish, ayurveda, and other realms of the Indian system of knowledge under one umbrella of the Sanatana Dharma.

While stressing on the popularity of the Indian systems, he said – “India is not just a modern nation. India is millennia old vedic civilization that went inside the consciousness behind the universe. However, presently, modern India has lost its connection with its traditional systems.” He mentioned that there was no one Holy Book or one God or one Guru for the Hindus. There are more festivals, more Gods, more Gurus, more sampradayas, more books in the Indian system than in any other country or culture of the world. He added that the Indian festivals in particular should be regarded as World Heritage. He also pointed out that the courts in the United States did not interfere in the matter of religions and even the Indian courts did not do that in the matters of other religions. However, for Hindus, the courts and the state are controlling the religion from outside. Commenting later on the Sabarimala verdict of the Supreme Court, he asserted that when the courts and the state had no stake in the matters of religions and when they did not consult any of the Hindu Acharyas on such matters, they did not have the right to pronounce such a judgement.

David Frawley comes from a Catholic background and got interested in the Indian systems during the 60s movement, thanks to the Beatles, Maharishi Yogi, Prabhupada, Paramhansa Yogananda who he considers to be the Father of Yoga for the West. What he found lacking in the western philosophies, he found in Buddhism, Hinduism, and other eastern traditions. Gradually, he also studied Advaita Vedanta, Ramana Maharshi and Sri Sri Aurobindo’s works. He started correspondence with Anandamayi Ma and M.P. Pandit of the Sri Sri Aurobindo Ashram who later published his works in India. About 30 years ago, he was advised to become a Hindu and realizing he was already living the life of a Hindu, he adopted Hinduism. He continued his work on the ancient wisdom of India and was soon faced with ridicule for debunking the Aryan Invasion theory and showing Hinduism in positive light. Without naming the journalist of The Week magazine, Dr. Frawley informed the audience that the hatred amounted to him being labeled as a well known fascist. However, defending his position, he added that for the issues he had stood for in the United States, he had often been labeled as a leftist.

Dr. Frawley also expressed his bewilderment over the love Indians gave to Freud and Marx. According to him, all of Freud and Marx could be contained in a small corner of Aurobindo’s or Adi Shankara’s works. Dr. David Frawley appealed to the audience and the Hindus in general to become Sadhakas or practitioners instead of becoming academics in their traditional systems. “The Hindu wisdom is universal in nature and as such is relevant to everyone. The great knowledge of ‘I’m neither this body nor this mind’ comes from the Vedanta and the exposition of this thought must come from the inner practitioners and not the academics. Hindus must assert themselves because others are doing it already. They should understand and practise their wisdom and spread it to the whole world.”, he added.

Dr. David Frawley believes that India can only rise as India or Bharat and not by some imposed idea from outside. Q&A followed his concluding remarks where he answered questions on inner spiritual growth for the urban youth. He took up other subjects as well and impressed upon his audience that the idea that one can only be a born Hindu and not a convert was a propaganda, and the courts shouldn’t have intervened in the Sabarimala issue.

 

A Pitch for Love by Kartik Kompella

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It’s been a while since I read a light-hearted fiction. My bookshelf is laden heavily with serious subjects that I used to feel embarrassed when someone wanted to borrow a lighter read. So, when I picked ‘A Pitch for Love’, it was a welcome change, especially after letting myself drown in Franz Kafka for a week. Just as I began to read, I knew I should thank the author for two things. One, the book wasn’t Mahabharata retold from Adhiratha’s point of view or Ramayana rewritten in Sumitra’s perspective. Two, the language, which used to be one of the important reasons I prefer not to read the so-called best-selling contemporary Indian authors.

Karthik Kompella has been a successful non-fiction author and editor with five books to his credits. ‘A Pitch for Love’ is his seventh book and debut in fiction. The book is a tale of office romance but Kartik’s female protagonist, Prachi, is no ‘damsel in distress’. She is the kind of career woman every girl aspires to be. She is smart, independent, and wildly successful. She reigns as the advertising queen. Drona, the male protagonist, on the other hand, reminded me of Vijay Devarakonda, the new prince of romance. On one hand, Drona is reckless and carefree and on another, he is sensitive and responsible. Either way, Kartik makes him look adorable.

Drona and Prachi, literally meet by an accident and, Drona gets employed by Prachi. The rest of the story is about whether these two found their way to each other’s heart. Before they get there, they had to deal with a lot of rivalries, office politics, and setbacks. And then there are Janaki, Ganapathi, Hizmout and others who remind you of the different kind of people you meet at any workplace. Since the story unfolds in the unconventional world of advertising, you get a sneak peek into how pitches are conceived and won amidst cutthroat competition. The chapters where Drona and Prachi work to win a tough client or deal with an extraordinary situation are quite creative and exciting. The book is also full of wittiness in conversations making it a ‘peppy’ read.

The author is also founder of a Brand consulting agency and that should explain the frequent mentions of brand names like Verna, Enfield, Jimmy Choos, Diesel Jeans etc. in the first few chapters. It was indeed distracting, but this problem seemed to have fixed itself in the later chapters and Kartik lets you ease into the story. One other thing, which I could have preferred otherwise, is the too much detailing of how a character looks, especially the female ones. While it might build the interest initially, it also becomes a drag after a while. Irrespective of all that, the book is a page-turner and the author successfully will convince you of Drona’s charm that you almost forgive him for all his amorous conquests.  Although a good part of the story happens inside the office premises, the events that happen beyond the office are the truly romantic ones. Prachi unwinding with her friend from past, Prachi’s dates with David, Drona’s adventure with Parvathi, Janaki’s time with Drona etc., and last but not the least, the Guy Fawkes day celebration etc. make a delightful read. So, if you are looking for an unconventional read in romance, ‘A Pitch for Love’ is a good choice.

Robert-Uttaro

Speaking of Sexual Violence with Robert Uttaro (Magazine Special)

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Robert Uttaro is a Rape Crisis Counselor, Public Speaker, and Community Educator. Inspired by his Undergraduate studies in Criminal Justice, he continues to embrace a life long commitment to activism and advocacy for survivors of sexual violence. He published his book ‘To The Survivors’ in the year 2013. Bookstalkist spoke with him about his work and related subjects. This interview was conducted in March, 2018. 

You have used the medium of a book to speak to the world about the problem of sexual violence. There are many people in today’s age who would have preferred a motion picture to a book. The question comes from a context. As a human race, we are increasingly growing thicker on our skin. It follows that we aren’t moved today unless we are shown images or videos. A documentary perhaps hits more than a newspaper story on any crime. What led you to write a book on this subject?

I did not consider myself a writer and never once tried to write a book until the experience of an intensely vivid dream one morning changed my life. I woke up from this dream and said, “I have to write a book.” I interpreted this dream as a vision from God. I prayed to God, moved from the bed to the computer, opened up Microsoft Word, and continued to pray. That is how To the Survivors began. In other words, God inspired me to write To the Survivors. God never asked me to make a movie or documentary, and I never once interpreted anything I have experienced in life or my dreams as a signal to make a movie or documentary.

I am not opposed to taking part in a documentary if someone ever asks me to, but creating a documentary was not the purpose for To the Survivors. I believe that To the Survivors can spread throughout the world because there is rape, evil, pain, and suffering in the world; and a book can help to educate, inspire, and heal. I love documentaries and movies but there is something powerful about the written word where people sit alone and read. Also, I love that there are no images or faces in To the Survivors. I have always hoped that people would interpret the book any way they choose and connect with it in any way they can. I always wanted it to be a universal book with universal messages. I believe people can possibly have more of a personal connection with messages in the book without images of people but through words and emotions. They can pick it up and read it any time and hopefully find comfort, strength, and peace in it.

 

You have also touched upon the subject of ‘Forgiveness’ in your book. That was a part we don’t usually see in common civic discourse. A large part of the public asks for retribution. Why is ‘Forgiveness’ so important to you?

Forgiveness is important to me because God has forgiven me of my sins. I have experienced God’s love and mercy over and over again, so it makes sense to me to extend the same to others. I believe forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do for people who have been hurt but the effects of forgiveness and unforgiveness are incredibly powerful. I believe in forgiveness even though I have struggled with forgiveness at various points in my life.

I am not here to tell people what to do and how they should live their lives. I believe forgiveness can mean something different for all of us and all of us make a choice to forgive or not forgive if we have been hurt. Do the survivors want to forgive? Do the perpetrators ask for forgiveness? It’s not for me to say but one of the saddest effects of sexual violence is when people blame themselves. So many people all over this world experience horrible, evil violations and they blame themselves. So, in terms of sexual violence, I do hope and pray that all survivors forgive themselves.

And if the unforgiveness of the perpetrators is continuing to hurt them, then I hope they can forgive, so that they can heal for themselves. As Timothy said in the ‘Forgiveness’ chapter, “lastly, be able to forgive their attacker for the survivor’s sake, not the perpetrator’s.”

In terms of sexual violence, many perpetrators feel no remorse. Sexual perpetration is arguably the hardest criminal activity to change. I believe God’s mercy is endless for those who genuinely ask for it, but not everyone does. I have seen some perpetrators achieve true remorse and change, while many continue to rape. This sadly will continue. I do believe perpetrators should be incarcerated for long periods of time and we can still have punishment and forgiveness. But does retribution solve anything? Does retribution stop evil? I wrote in To the Survivors, “What if we are not able to forgive? Does it hurt or affect us in the short and long term? If so, how does it hurt or affect us? Does it help people who are able to forgive, regardless of what they are forgiving? If so, how is it helpful? Ultimately, what are the impacts on our lives if we forgive or don’t forgive?” I believe our answers to these questions deeply impact our lives and that is another reason why forgiveness is important to me.

A lot of these people who perpetuate sexual violence might have had a difficult childhood. A few of them have themselves been victims at some point in their lives. Have you met such people? Are they open to be healed?

A lot of people have difficult childhoods but do not rape or attempt to rape. It is true that some of the perpetrators of sexual violence have been victimized but sexual violence should never be accepted or minimized. I have met perpetrators and people I have suspected as being perpetrators. In my experiences and from everything I have learned thus far, it is rare to see sexual offenders open to being healed.

That does not mean it can’t happen because it can but I would not say it is the norm. Human trafficking continues to be on the rise and is now the second most lucrative criminal activity. Some people travel from different countries to rape children, even if they think it is just sex (which it is not). That demand and desire is not going away any time soon. It is more common for me to see people who have been victims/survivors be open to healing as opposed to the perpetrators but like I said before, anyone can choose to change and be open to healing. That is their choice.

Have you found anyone in your personal relationships who has been sexually assaulted? Have you tried to help them? Have you been able to heal someone close? What was your approach like?

By the grace of God, I have played a positive role in the healing process of some survivors. Yes, I have known people in personal relationships who have been raped and I have tried to help them in any way possible. I believe we should try to help each other with anything, not just people who are sexually assaulted. My approach is the same as what I described in the book. I believe people and listen to them. We must believe and listen to each other. The way we respond to sexual violence is incredibly important. We have the ability to send people down a path of healing or destruction. Believing, listening, and supporting people in whatever they need is vital. I try my best to meet people where they are at. Some people want to talk, some cry, some want to just listen to music or watch television. Some people want to go to the police and others have no desire to speak to the police. So, I try my best to help survivors with whatever they need.

People who are raped or sexually assaulted have their power and control taken from them. We have to help them regain their power and control. I don’t think we should tell others what they must do but rather support them and allow them to make their own decisions. We need to be sensitive, gentle, empathetic, and compassionate. I wrote in the ‘Victim Blaming’ chapter, “If we believe, listen, and validate, we strengthen and help. If we blame, we confuse and hurt.”

How do you see the entire #MeToo movement? 

I think it has been very empowering for many women while also negatively affecting others. I personally believe it has been great for women who connect with the movement and use their voices. Sexual violence is extremely difficult to talk about for so many people, so I do believe it is special for so many women to speak out against sexual assault and harassment. I know of one woman who was raped and struggles deeply with shame and insecurity. Sadly, she sabotages almost everything good in her life. But she was moved by the #MeToo movement and joined it. For her, it was empowering. And to me, that is beautiful.

The movement has also brought a significant amount of awareness to some of these issues, so I think it is good that much of the public has been thinking and speaking about it. It clearly has caused dialogue. However, some women have been upset with it. They do not openly talk about their experiences and don’t want to feel pressured to do so. They don’t want to feel like they haven’t reached a certain point in their healing. So I think it’s important to also respect those people who do not wish to participate.
Finally, the #MeToo movement has done wonderful things for millions of women who have suffered and continue to suffer, and I think that is special. But I also think the pain that many men and boys experience has gone unnoticed. I will never diminish the pain that countless women experience but men and boys are sexually harassed, sexually assaulted, and raped as well. When discussing sexual violence, I believe we must think about and care for all genders and all victims/survivors of these crimes.


Do men assault more than any other gender?

Yes.

Are assaults on men not being taken seriously enough? Is it discouraging men from opening up and talking about it?

I do think assaults of men are taken seriously in certain parts of the world but I would not say that is the norm. Can that deter some many men from opening up? Absolutely. Far too many men are not believed or made to feel even worse when they do choose to open up. But some people do care and take it very seriously.

I will never forget an event I went to for male rape survivors where the male survivors’ wives expressed complete devastation. Their tears and facial expressions pierced my heart. Many of them came over to me and bought my book. I do not believe they knew their husbands were raped as kids when they began dating and I am willing to bet, it has been difficult in their marriages.

They were very supportive and sought resources to help but they also looked completely lost. As for the men, some men stood and shared their stories while people continued to cry. I remember a man in particular who shared his story and did so in angry tones. He yelled, “I ain’t thriving, surviving, none of that!” I believe many men are like this man, but I know it is possible to get to places of healing like other male survivors have.

You have written about survivors who were assaulted during their childhood. The problem is that children do not realize that there is something wrong happening to them before they grow up to understand crimes of sexual nature. What would you suggest the parents or the society at large to prevent sexual assaults on children?

This is true. Many children do not realize something wrong is happening to them before they grow up, while others may know but do not know how to speak about it. So many children are also terrified to speak and worry that no one will even believe them. Parents and society as a whole, need to be aware of what is going on with their children and others around them. Most of the sexual abuse committed against children is perpetrated by someone the child victim knows. So, much abuse exists within families and other safe spaces where pedophiles have easy access to children. I believe we need to be educated on the realities of sexual violence, stop abuse from occurring if we see something happen, and check in with our children. I also think we have to acknowledge that there are people from all genders sexually abusing children of all genders.

First of all, the best way sexual violence against children can be prevented is for people to not sexually abuse children. A change in the heart must occur for those who are committing these evil crimes. There is a desire for far too many to rape and molest children. They choose to commit atrocities against our most innocent and they can choose not to. Sadly, many will not change and not all sexual abuse on this earth will be prevented. With that being said, there are plenty of things we can do.

In To the Survivors for example, there are two stories of men (Jim and Chris) who were sexually abused as children. In both stories, the pedophiles groomed the boys. There were many inappropriate things happening, mainly isolation from others. Jim was taken out of school during the day to smoke a cigarette with a priest, and Chris’ camp counselor constantly took him away from everyone else at the camp. How did no adults see these things occurring? And if they were aware, how could they not step in and confront the issue? Adults could have prevented the sexual abuse of two young boys and the suffering that they endured for many years but that did not happen. So, we must be aware and act. We have to act if we see adults trying to isolate kids for no reason. The least we must do is check in to gain clarity on what is happening.

Another odd behaviour we can notice is unhealthy touching. Kids need physical affection and should feel safe and protected. I work with kids quite often and we play tag games where kids and adults are touching each other by tagging. This is normal. It’s also normal for an adult to hold a child’s hand when necessary and help them when they are physically hurt.

But unhealthy touch is different than healthy touch, and we need to know the difference. No adult should tag a kid or touch a kid on the buttocks, chest, or genitals. We have to be aware when adults have kids on their laps for significant periods of time unnecessarily and when we see any kinds of unhealthy touch.

We need to act if we see abuse occurring. Far too much abuse is happening and people know but do not act. For example, plenty of children are sexually abused by family members. Some do not know that their loved ones are being abused, but some do. Those who know abuse is happening and do not act to stop it are allowing it. They may not intervene for different reasons such as fear, not being believed, cultural norms, or not wanting to break up a family but survivors suffer deeply as a result of our inaction. And if someone cannot intervene themselves, they need to seek out a trusted adult to intervene and that adult should intervene.

Our legal systems must also incarcerate paedophiles who abuse children when convicted. Most perpetrators are never arrested or incarcerated. We need to have a supportive and welcoming environment for people to make reports of sexual abuse against children. Convictions can be difficult in sexual abuse cases but if a legal system does find a perpetrator to be guilty of sexually abusing a child, I believe the person needs to be incarcerated for a lengthy period of time. Many perpetrators are never even brought to trial while others are brought to trial but exonerated. Others are found guilty but receive a light sentence.

Lastly, we need to check in with our kids. How are they doing? Are they happy? Are they receiving what they need? Are they struggling mentally or emotionally? If the answer to the last question is yes, what are we doing to help them? We need to protect children at all costs and cultivate their education and development. We need to help in their trust and healing if they have been abused. Children are so deeply influenced in both good and bad ways by us. The way we treat them and respond to them is incredibly important. We have the power to make powerful changes in their lives and I hope and pray more adults support children in any way they know how.

Humanity continues to be in chaos. Too many people hate, fight, rape, and kill each other. Human beings differ in so many ways but no matter where we come from, what language we speak, or what we believe in; all of us should love and protect children.

India is debating marital rape at present. Do you think the issue of marital rape is complex in nature from a legal angle?

I do not believe marital rape is complex from a legal standpoint. Rape cases can be complex, but not every rape case is complex. Some cases are quite clear, so why would marital rape be different? Complexities can be the same whether it is marital rape or non-marital rape. For example, if a man rapes a woman and there is clear evidence that she was raped, that is not complex. It is complex if a woman is raped but there is no evidence of rape. The same is true in a marriage. If a husband rapes his wife and there is clear evidence of rape, what is complex about that? But if a man rapes his wife and there is no evidence, then that is complex.

I just read that the Supreme Court ruled that marital rape cannot be considered a criminal offence in India. That decision is truly horrible. The Supreme Court has continued to allow men to rape their own wives. This decision says it is perfectly acceptable to rape your wife. There is no logic in that decision and it is infuriating and sickening. How do we prevent sexual violence? We can at least begin with not allowing it through the law.

Think of the pain so many women go through. Think of the fear so many women live with. Think of the utter lack of love so many women experience. Also, think of what the Supreme Court’s decision endorses and teaches Indian men. Think of what this shows and teaches Indian boys. My heart breaks for the people of India and other countries that legally permit marital rape. I pray for everyone affected and I pray for a legal change in the future. The Supreme Court’s decision is inhumane and will play an active role in the rape and deep shame and suffering that many will continue to experience.


You mention in the introduction to the book that it is painful to know of the stories of survivors. There may also be rage to see so many people affected by this. Does it take a toll on your psyche? How do you deal with this feeling?

Yes, working with rape on a daily basis affects my psyche but I love what I do and will never stop. How do I deal with it? God. Jesus. Mary. Music. Meditation. And my beautiful wife.

I cannot begin to explain how much God loves us and how God is always with us, even when we do not feel it or believe it. God has never once left me and has always strengthened me and given me anything I have needed. God is more powerful than any pain on this earth. Sadly, far too many people keep their pain inside and suffer inside. I want them to give their pain away, either to someone else or to God. I take my pain and give it to God, and when I do that, I am relaxed and strengthened to continue this work. I am always moved when I pray with my heart.

Jesus is my greatest teacher. I learn so much from him when I read the Gospels — especially the Gospel of John — and when I meditate and pray. I ask for his guidance and wisdom, and I ask for his gentle words and touch to heal others. I have seen it happening. I also have a deep love of Jesus’ mother Mary, the queen of peace. I pray for Mary to use her motherly love to help those who are suffering. For me personally, praying the rosary gives me clarity, peace of mind, and strength.

I love to mediate and listen to music, and I equate the two. Today while I was teaching in school, another teacher led a yoga class with 8th grade students. I participated and experienced so much relaxation and peace through yoga and the sound of the music. I also just have a deep love of music. I can listen to music for hours and hours. Music means so much to me and has impacted me throughout my life.

Lastly, I am so incredibly lucky to have met my soulmate. My wife means the world to me. She is a constant source of love for me and she is always there for me, especially in my darkest moments. She has seen how working with rape has sometimes affected me in negative ways and she has always been a light to me. I can go to her with anything and she has always been there with me through this journey. I can look into her beautiful eyes and feel comfort. I truly am a lucky man.

We have often seen people turning away from God in the face of pain or misery. As someone who comes face to face with so many stories of suffering and pain, how do you continue to believe in God? Or how do you explain so much pain to yourself in spite of the presence of a divine power?

You are right that many people turn away from God in the face of pain and misery. It makes me very sad. This is one of the reasons why I believe I was meant to do this work and write To the Survivors. My faith is what strengthens me and keeps me going. I can understand why so many people don’t believe in God but ultimately, God is always with us on this earth.

Just look at the world we live in. Many people say things like, “God can’t exist. Look how horrible this world is.” I say, “Look how horrible this world is. This can’t be all we have. Paradise awaits anyone who wants it.” Too many people blame God for the pain of this world but the reality is that human beings commit atrocities against each other. Too many people like to blame something, anything else other than looking at their own lives and choices.

People have asked me the exact same question you asked. My relationship with God has grown even closer since becoming a rape crisis counselor. My faith in God has strengthened while my faith in human institutions has decreased. Just look at this world. Far too many people put their faith in our political leaders. How are our political leaders doing? Are they fixing our problems? India just ruled that marital rape is not a criminal offense. So many American politicians do not do what they should do and lead. Our political systems are corrupt and human institutions are flawed. They always will be.

Look at our religious leaders. How are they doing? Are they teaching the truth about God or are they distorting God? Are they using religious texts to promote peace, love, and mercy; or are they using these texts to promote division and violence? There are far too many religious leaders who lie, manipulate, and even rape. Too many take money from people, including poor people, for their own selfish desires. Some religious leaders truly care and teach the truth about God’s love while others use God for evil. This is part of the reason why many do not even believe.

You say there is a divine power. Just look at the universe. It is endless. We can’t even see it but we know it exists. I hope and pray people look up to the sky, see the stars, and commune with the universe. I have already told you that I wrote a book due to a dream. I have had spiritual experiences through dreams that I will never forget. For me, I can think of them as I continue to live my life. Thinking of those dreams strengthens me and gives me clarity to continue in my work and to continue asking for God’s guidance.

I talk to God in both good times and bad. People from every ethnic, socio-economic and religious background have difficulties in life. Jesus never once said life was easy but Jesus did say, “Do not let your hearts be troubled”, “Do not fear”, and “Have faith.” Some people say that to believe in God makes no sense. To me, it’s one of the only things that make sense.

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I am a loyalist as a customer. My brand of toothpaste has not changed in all these thirty years. I might have occasionally tried other ones, but I duly return to my favourite brand. Spending more than 9 years in my first job did teach me that nobody is indispensable, yet I tend to believe that I matter as a customer. I also know that the vendor who sells me vegetables, charges relatively more than the other ones around, yet I find it difficult to move on from her. Continue reading “Dear Zomato” →